These days

This is the view from a home in the Hollywood Hills.  I was here for a work party last week with directors, producers, and Hollywood people.  My work is taking me to glamorous places I never thought I'd go and connecting me to people I never thought I'd be in the same room with--but it's also been the source of some of the hardest experiences and relationships I've ever faced in my life.  You can definitely ask me more about it if you'd like, but let's just say it's been trial by fire. 

To quote Radiohead, "for a minute there I lost myself" but thank the Lord
for rest . . . for nature, for art, for wholesome and simple food, for quiet, for growth, for hope.  

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One thing I've noticed in my part of LA is that there are a lot of bars . . . bars to keep people out, and bars to protect what you own.  I have to admit that constantly looking at heavy bars everywhere can bum me out.

I took these two photos by my church today.  What I love is that the flowers and plant-life are spilling out over the bars, and the bright colors speak of welcome and invitation.  Yay, not everything is concrete and metal and ugly around here.

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Dang, I've been gone for a long time.  Part of it was due to starting a new job, and part of it was due to misplacing my camera (I hope I find it soon).

I have been through a lot of transition this year but it's looking like things will settle down in about six months.  Yay.

I'm still here

 
 

I'm still here!  I know I was posting a lot during my season of unemployment but I found a job.  Praise the Lord . . . it's been a rough ride.  My heart and prayers are with all the people in our country who are facing joblessness.

Happy 2012!

Happy 2012!  I can't believe the new year is upon us.  I'm looking forward to all the good that lies ahead . . . and slowly learning to become more resilient in the face of adversity and change.

Christmas 2011

Christmas 2011 was extremely low key and fun (but don't get me wrong . . . I don't want to present a sanitized view of my life on this blog.  There was the lingering depression, illness, and anxiety in the midst of good things).  But back to the good things that saved me from the sad things: family, friends, church, homemade gifts, Christmas parties, food, games, and an overall sense of hope from Jesus . . . 

Homemade cranberry jalapeno jam from C.

I made Gallagher's Brown bread to give as gifts.

Yute.

The flicking game.

Shabu Shabu Christmas dinner.

Banchan.

The meat.

The fried rice post Shabu Shabu.

The Christmas cookies at a friend's party.

Keepin' at it

Sometimes this . . .

Leads to this . . . 

And these . . . 

A Weekend of Observing

Drawing Beneath the Skin

Some of you know that I took a life drawing class a few years ago while still living in Orange County.  It was called "Drawing Beneath the Skin" and it lasted for six weeks during the summer.

Ah, I have fond memories of this class.  This class helped me reawaken my passion for making.  I would post obnoxiously ecstatic Facebook updates after this class.  I would lay out all my drawings in the living room for Monday night show-and-tell with my roommate, who was such a good sport and would give me positive feedback while looking at sketches of naked bodies.  Some even told me I looked happier and smiled more.

If you have ever taken a life drawing class you know that it is hard work!  Drawing the human body requires skill and a thorough understanding of anatomy (including specific muscles, bones, joints, ligaments, etc.).  We were given anatomy packets each week, and used a real human skeleton to help us understand the framework of the body.  I have a lot of respect for fine artists who draw and paint the human body.

I don't think life drawing is my forte but I'm so glad I took the class.  There were some key lessons I learned during the six weeks that will stay with me for a lifetime.

1. Discipline.  My instructor was excellent.  He could tell by my sketch marks where I got frustrated and moved on, and where I couldn't make a decision and got stuck.  He encouraged me to follow through with my lines and keep working at points where I got stuck.  I learned over the course of the class how to stay focused with my sketches and not give up.

2. Passion.  There were moments where I entered my own world while drawing.  I forgot where I was, I forgot there were other people around me, and I stopped paying attention to how much time had passed, and it was just me, the paper, and my nub of charcoal.  My instructor even told me one time that he could visibly see me in the zone, and I thought it was such interesting feedback to hear from another person.  I'm at this point in my life where I'm trying to figure out what I'm really passionate about so it's helpful to think back on these times where I just got into the zone.

3. Style.  I'm learning more and more what defines my artistic style.  My most successful drawings were our quick one minute gesture drawings where the model would change positions after a minute and we had to capture the form rather than every detail.  The instructor pointed out my strong contour lines and angles.  Hence, this is probably why I am drawn to printmaking rather than detailed drawings and paintings.

Another side note that I thought was interesting was that my instructor described my drawing style as "nervous and chaotic," which I thought was funny because I don't think I come off that way in person (although I can get nervous sometimes).  I just think it's funny that I'm such a calm and mellow person in real life who has such a crazy drawing style.  Perhaps it's a subconscious way to express my hidden self?

 

Extending hospitality

Here's some context to yesterday's enigmatic post: I had just come home from a good friend's mother's funeral and I guess I had these thoughts and emotions running through me.  She passed away after a long battle with cancer.   

My friend's mom was an awesome woman.  I'm so blessed to have known her and I'm really grateful that I've had a chance to get to know the families of my good friends, and that they've been able to connect with my family.  There's just a deeper understanding you gain about people when you get to know their families. 

Some of the thoughts shared about my friend's mom at her funeral were in regard to her hospitable spirit and care for others.  I've definitely been a recipient of her hospitality and care.  In college she gave me a pair of really warm socks and a bottle of floral-scented lotion for Christmas.  I still wear the socks around the house when it gets cold.  And more recently I had the rare opportunity to see her at her home a week before her passing.  Even in her very weakened state, she asked if I'd been offered something to eat.  I also noticed how decorated the house looked for Halloween and the fall season.

The priest who presided over the funeral likened my friend's mom to Martha in the Bible.  Martha was a close friend of Jesus' and one of those women who never stopped working to keep the house in order.  She was like the friend who would let you crash at her house whenever you were in town, and one of those people who kept extra toothbrushes and toiletries around for guests just in case (I have some friends like that, and my old roommate and I have housed our many traveling friends--it's great to have friends who feed you and let you crash on their couch).  She was the kind of woman who would cook lots of good food for lots of people and open up her home to anyone in the community.  Her home was a hub for the community to come gather and connect.

There's just something so subtle yet artful in being able to welcome people into your home, offer a warm meal or a cool drink, and pass on a spirit of hospitality and care.  I'm grateful for this woman, and the many other friends, mentors, and family members who have not only shown me their hospitality and care, but have taught me how to pass these things onto others.    

A Journey

I've been thinking a lot about choices and direction lately (it's probably because I'll soon be leaving my '20s, and those two topics seem to come up a lot in one's '20s and '30s).

For some reason I immediately thought about these two images from Pieter Bruegel the Elder, the Flemish Renaissance painter (I'm not an expert on Renaissance art but I remember these images from a high school text book).

I can't really pinpoint why these two images came to mind but there's definitely something about the theme of journey in both of these paintings.  More to ponder . . .

On a side note, isn't it amazing the vivid stories both these paintings tell you?  I find it helpful to ask a lot of questions to get at the stories.

I also find it helpful to add a soundtrack to art (take an iPod to the museum one day - it's a delight for the senses) . . . my selection would be Ludovico Einaudi's Nuvole Bianche.

 

"The Fall of Icarus" by Pieter Bruegel the Elder.  Image via gordonbrander.com 

"Hunters in the Snow" by Pieter Bruegel the Elder.  Image gordonbrander.com

Thanksgiving 2010

My family and I have celebrated Thanksgiving with a more traditional American meal for the past decade or so. My mom is in charge of the turkey and I'm in charge of the sides. I'm a big fan of Thanksgiving food in general . . . I love the cranberry sauce, yams, mashed potatoes, pies . . . I love it all. I even love the dish of kimchi at our table (kimchi is a good complement to turkey by the way - especially the dark meat). But this year my family and I are going out for Thanksgiving to a Korean-Chinese restaurant in LA we go to all the time. It's been an extremely busy and relationally full season and I just don't have it in me to cook this year. And I guess I'm not alone because I've noticed that there are way more pre-made Thanksgiving meals at the stores and a lot of restaurants advertising that they are open on Thanksgiving. I guess it's the sign of the times - people are busier, there are more single parent households than ever before, and the pace of life just seems so much quicker now.
Well, maybe next year my family will go back to making a turkey and all the fixings but this year I'm going to enjoy seeing my parents, brother and sister-in-law, and eating sweet and sour beef, garlic shrimp, and noodles in black bean sauce with pork. Mmmm . . . can't wait!

Also, here are some pics of inspiration from my old roommate's wedding this past weekend. Congratulations Mr. and Mrs. L!

This gentleman found his way to our table.


Got to bring one of the floral arrangements home because I knew some people. My friend T. worked on the flowers. She's not a professional but you wouldn't have known that by looking at her arrangements. So pretty and well designed!